WHY YOU SHOULD BE ANGRY

Something is clicking, and the work is working.

In order for us to push on harder, I know it is so important to exemplify some of the ways in which the work WE are doing together is ABSOLUTELY changing hearts and minds.

Please see the comments below that show people waking up and reexamining why their words, thoughts, and behaviors have not been helping anyone, most importantly, themselves.

OPENING MINDS

These were all interactions that were prompted because I spoke up, y’all supported the convo, and WE, as a team, were able to lean into “fighting” with love at the core, a core principle of the Love Army.

What so many people are experiencing around the world right now is GRIEF.

Grief for what they thought the world was, and now seeing it for what it really is. For better or worse, I was forced to reckon with this a long time ago. The rightful and just anger many are experiencing right now is something that I have lived in and through. It is an IMPORTANT part of grief. Please remember that, and be gentle with yourself as you understand this deeper and deeper.

Some days it pops back up in big ways, and other days it doesn’t show up at all.

I share this to both validate your anger and to let you know that it does not have to hold you hostage. We should be angry. To be honest, I truly don’t think enough people are angry enough. However, they are getting there, and that is super important to remember because there is power in numbers.

I share this next part to be even more vulnerable with you all. In my work, I have come to understand how important vulnerability is, not only when it serves us on TED stages (I’m looking at you, Ms. Brown), but all the time. When we are vulnerable, we create safe and brave spaces for others to be vulnerable as well. This is key to creating change.

I have been VERY ANGRY.

I’ve been very angry both on and offline. It was meaningful for me to be angry. It helped me connect with others who understood my anger. It allowed me to move beyond people-pleasing. It got rid of people in my life who did not fully support me. It helped me move through my own grief.

I hope this reminds you that it is meaningful for you to be angry as well. Too many of us have been told not to be angry. That is trash. It is a patriarchal tactic to gaslight those of us who should be angry out of it, so we don’t keep questioning these fucked-up systems. It is also interesting, when you examine how patriarchy operates, to think about how anger is one of the few emotions straight men can identify and are encouraged to feel.

Why is it only good for them? It isn’t.

So when my anger pops up, as it will at different moments forever, what I center myself on is that I do NOT want to be an angry person.

Anger does not help me think clearly. It does not feed my soul, and it does not help me push for actionable change in the ways that I can control. It can be part of what ignites me, but it can’t be where I operate from because it does not allow me to stay as focused and clearheaded as I’ve had to be all of these years.

I will never tell anyone how to feel. What I can do is act as an example, and show you the very real examples of change that I’ve been able to facilitate through education, empowerment, accountability, and yes, sometimes a little sass too.

Let me know how you are feeling, and let’s keep using this anger to ignite us, but not be in the driver’s seat of our lives.

Fight on lovers. Fight on!